Monotony: I am not a bathroom person. I do not like bathrooms. I do not like thinking about, them, being in them, or being near them. The main reason I do not like bathrooms is that they most often house a toilet, urinal, bidet, or other some other bodily fluid capturing device. These contraptions, albeit necessary, do not sit well with me. And I don't sit well on them. I had the experience of coming home the other day to discover that one of my roommate's friends had done the honors of clogging the toilet. Unfortunately, I did not discover this unfortunate face until after I had used the toilet and then flushed it. I watched in horror as the water level rose...and rose...and rose. Needless to say the floor got very wet. Now when I said that I don't like toilets, I meant that I do not like touching them at all, and drying up toilety water from the floor is basically like putting your hand in the toilet. Also, to dry up all the water, I had to sacrifice MY OWN BATH TOWEL. If that does not make me a hero, then I don't know what does. I then got to use the plunger. That was fun. I shall soon inform my roommate's friend to cut down on his fiber intake if he plans on coming back.

Exceptionality: For the past few weeks I have been looking for a television for a decent price. Because every college student needs to be able to play their Nintendo 64. I found a posting on Craigslist for a television that was to be sold at a yard sale. It was listed as a TV for $75. I recognized from the Craigslist posting that the sellers were old and feeble and I could easily take advantage of them. But I was gravely mistaken. I sent the lady an email regarding the television and inquired whether or not she would be able to move on the price. After a feverish email-bartering-battle (consisting of 2 emails) I had triumphed and lowered the price to $55 dollars. A few days later I went to pick up the TV further haggled the lady down to a price of $30. Actually she insisted that I only pay 30 and I tried to give her 40. I got the TV back to my apartment and then watched my roomate and his friends carry it up 3 flights of stairs. It looked exhausting. With all the business said and done, I know have a 56" television. And believe me, Perfect Dark has never looked better. Or so life-sized.

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